doug smith training

'It's irksome to get blamed for a problem. That can raise emotions that make solving the problem even more difficult. If we can center ourselves first, breathe, and release the blame, maybe we can see what path to take. We can solve the problem. Getting blamed for a problem we didn't create doesn't prevent us from solving it. Let go of the blame, wherever it came from. -- doug smith   Action Step: The next time you catch yourself blaming anyone for anything, just let go of the blame. 

  As a recovering perfectionist, I've tried to make peace with temporary solutions. I do still want everything to be perfect (and to STAY that way) while also learning that even my best ideas are transitional at best. Things will change. I will change. You will change. Our ideas and solutions will also need to change. If we can stop thinking that solutions are final our problems won't seem so troubling. Because whatever we don't solve NOW can still be solved later.  What do you think? -- doug smith

Change is not a burden. Change is proof of life. -- doug smith

How flexible is your perspective? Once we form a vision of what we think is true, it's so easy to stick with that view. Right or wrong, that view is incomplete. We omit important details. We add our preferences to our references and develop a distinctive mix.  As nice as that feels, it is also constraining. Flexibility allows for flow. Openness questions the certain to detect the incorrect. Perspective flexibility is our friend. It's not always easy to change the way you look at things, but it always helps. -- doug smith

Have you ever danced to a tune you didn't like? Maybe it was at a wedding, or a holiday gathering, or a nightclub, or some other place. Dancing was around you and so you danced.  Dancing is usually a choice. Unless it is against your belief system (as a child I remember people in my family who thought that dancing was a sin) dancing is on the whole more beneficial than difficult.  I used to believe that I was a good dancer -- until my partner broke up with me and I discovered that SHE was the good dancer, so good that she makes anyone she dances with look like a better dancer (even me). And yet, still I dance. I remember the celebration dinner for a project that I worked on when the president of the company joined the rest of us on the dance floor to do a fun line dance. I'll admit, he danced better than me. For one of the programs that I teach I offer the participants the opportunity to dance in a brief virtual dance party. Some people do (and seem to enjoy it) and some people

Be kind, even when it's hard. Even when the way escapes you at first. If you can't think of a fast way to be kind, a slow way will do just fine. The point is to act with kindness. -- doug smith  

Thinking the best leaves less room for the rest. I'm a fan of unconditional positive regard. I can assume that people are doing the wrong thing on purpose when I don't like what they do, but it doesn't change what they did and it's not likely to make things any better.  When I assume that people are doing they best they know how to do it's much easier to correct mistakes. Fix the process, not the person. Change the behavior, not the intention. People intend to do good things -- they just sometimes get confused. -- doug smith  

Successful supervisors keep their attitude clearly and constantly positive. Leave no doubt what you care about. -- doug smith  

Everything is work in progress. What will you improve today? -- doug smith  

Your products will prosper when people are your priority. -- doug smith  

A deadline given to you by someone else is their deadline, not yours. Agreement is everything. -- doug smith