doug smith training

Regrets are meant for learning, not suffering. We all have regrets. There are so many mistakes we make that we believe we could easily solve given one more chance. But could we? Really? Or would it be like some lost episode of "The Twilight Zone" where our actions simply triggered new mistakes, new circumstances, and repetitive results? We can't go back anyway. As of this moment in time, there is no time travel (and if there were EVER any time travel, wouldn't it apply to always?) I have things that I have regretted but here's what I've learned. Easy or hard, painful or trivial, just get over it. Regrets are meant for learning. There's no reason to keep beating ourselves up about it. Do your best. Make amends. Move on. -- doug smith

Who tells lies? That's not a trick question. We all lie.  There may even be some circumstances when lying seems appropriate. The trouble is when we lie we convince ourselves that the circumstances warrant lying, even when they don't. It makes it hard to know when anyone's telling the truth. It makes it hard to make and keep agreements. It doesn't have to be that way. We could simply tell the truth. Always. Some conversations would take longer. Some conversations might contain more conflict than we'd like. But, imagine what a boost your level of trust gets when people realize that you can be relied on to always tell the truth. Not just when it's easy. Not just when it's convenient. Always. Wouldn't you rather live with no more lies? Tell the truth. You can handle it. -- doug smith

Why do we lie? That's a compelling question worth exploring. I once read that on average we tell about 26 lies a day. That's a lot of lying. But as leaders, don't we rely on our people to tell the truth? Aren't they (and our customers, and our families!) relying on US to tell the truth? What if it's not exactly our fault? What if we can dramatically reverse the amount of lies we tell by adding a bit of mindfulness? I like this video. It involves behavioral science and while it would be nice to have even more research on this, I do find the evidence compelling that very often we lie unconsciously. Watch the video and see what you think. Interesting experiment? What opportunities can you think of where you work to wake-up the moral foundation in yourself and in the people in your life? How can you remind people that you are counting on the truth? We all must communicate effectively to achieve the results that we want. That means finding, and delivering,

Do you secretly want to change something? It's bugging you, aggravating you, annoying you, standing in your way and you just want it to be different? Change is tough. One necessary part of changing something is to talk about it. Talk about it with people who can make a difference. Talk about it with people who feel your pain. Talk about it. If you want to change it, talk about it. Then get busy. -- doug smith

I know how it feels to fail to communicate. For too long I would keep my feelings to myself. Too many times my thoughts were secret. All too often my silence would be assumed as agreement when that simply was not true. No more. I've focused on improving, on developing my communication skills, and whenever possible, to help other people with theirs. Because it's so important. In many ways, it's the whole ball game. Fail to communicate and how will you ever get what you want? Fail to communicate and how will you manage to make a positive difference in the world? Few things hurt more or do more damage than failure to communicate. I'm still learning how to communicate more effectively. How about you? -- doug smith

I often quote Susan Scott ("Fierce Conversations") who said, "Let silence do the heavy lifting." It's powerfully useful. Those awkward silences are times to think, times to process, times to remain curious. Today I'd like to add this: We rush to fill the silence. We awkwardly walk away. We miss the silent opportunity. It's not a time to hurry, it's a time to remain mindful. Be there. Process. Listen. Our first reactions are often less than optimal. Let your thinking and your emotions percolate. Let them brew. Explore, discover, something that might be new. Silence is too powerful to waste. Use the gift that it brings. -- doug smith

We specialize in workshops that help people get things done without ticking each other off. Mostly, that means helping people communicate more effectively. To bring one of our workshops to your location, please contact us at: doug@dougsmithtraining.com Here is a selection of our most popular, and successful workshops: Communication Boot Camp -  How to Communicate for the Results You Want  - One day workshop to help you develop the skills you need to create deeper, more effective conversations, build stronger relationships, and communicate with tact, respect, diplomacy, and professionalism. Add a second day to develop more productive meetings and learn how to deliver more powerful and influential presentations. It's Not About the Slides... Powerful Presentation Skills  -  Get beyond the slides and into the hearts and minds of your audience. Whether you make one presentation a year or one every day, how you communicate during a presentation is either propelling