doug smith training

How important is trust in a team? When I ask leaders this question the usual answer is "It's everything. Without trust the team falls apart." I'd agree. Your team members must trust you as the leader to act with their interests in mind as well as the interests of the organization and of your customers. And you as the leader must be able to trust team members to perform in ways that serve the mission, help your customers, and help each other. I'd also add that trust starts with respect. Where does respect start? This is not a chicken-or-egg question. The answer is clear: respect starts with the leader. When you respect your team members, they witness how important that is, how useful it feels, and how necessary it remains. Show respect, receive respect -- in that order. It does not work in reverse. -- doug smith

Have you ever sat thru a meeting or event and wondered, "Who's in charge of this mess?" Do you encounter broken processes that get in the way of success and that interfere with customer or team member happiness? This can be a challenge, but it is also a choice:  If you look around and wonder "who is in charge of fixing this mess?" it could be you. It probably is you.  -- doug smith  

It's that simple: yes, or no. I've heard many leaders bemoan the trouble it takes to get a lazy worker to work. If that's really the problem, the possibilities but be fewer (and more immediate) than you think. A poor performer can be redirected, re-skilled, and learn to improve. Some of the best performers on teams that I have worked with struggled at times, but turned it around because they applied themselves to the mission, to the vision, and to their goals. Heck, I've struggle as well and in some cases without the valuable feedback and coaching that was provided I probably would have crashed and burned. But someone who simply refuses to perform thru laziness simply must go. Yes, or no -- are they willing to work, or no? As someone in one of my workshops once said, "sometimes you have to help them prosper -- some place else." -- doug smith  

Leaders encounter a lot of resistance. You can probably think of at least three examples in your own experience of dealing with people disagreeing with you. It probably made your job tougher. Conflict isn't always bad, but it is usually uncomfortable. Even handled well, it takes time.  What can we do to prevent the kind of resistance that wastes time?  We can disagree about details and still get along if we agree on our values. But if we disagree about our values then our details can't be trusted. To build momentum, agreement, and effectiveness, I think that it starts with shared values.  What do you think? -- doug smith

How long does it take you to recognize when you've made a mistake? It varies. That time as a child when I put my little hand on a hot stove, I knew immediately that was a mistake. But that time that I lost weeks of work and sleep over a broken relationship, that took awhile to figure out. It's even possible to rationalize a mistake.  It's as if a thief says "I deserve this because I've had a hard life" or a counselor says to themselves "of course it's fine for me to love that client in that possibly inappropriate way because they do love me don't they?" That's dangerous territory for a leader. We might even need other people to let us know when we get close to the margins so we can pull back to safety. We might need hedges around our walls around our moats to keep us safe. And unless we recognize a mistake, we won't learn from it.  It's hard to correct mistakes, and harder still if we keep defending them. -- doug smith  

What should we do with bad rules? If you added up all of the rules you are subject to during your life they would likely fill a three-hundred page book (and that's NOT counting the Apple User Agreement...) If we distilled all of those rules down to the really necessary ones, you could fit them all on one page. But instead, we face volumes and volumes of rules written by other people who have only THEIR interests in mind, who do not consult us on our preferences, and who expect to enforce those rules as if they were the Ten Commandments. What do you think of that? The other day an organization that was interested in influencing me listed a set of rules so arcane, so arduous, and so mean that I couldn't even READ them all (without gagging) much less agree to them. Where does that arrogance come from? What makes people think that other people will adhere to such one-sided rules? Doesn't that make it harder to defend the rules that DO make sense? If we confront people with enou

Leaders get stuff done through other people. We establish visions, follow our mission, and set goals. Goals are a way to remind ourself to get stuff done, but it's the work that you do that gets stuff done. Do the work. -- doug smith  

Change, change, change. We break things apart. We tear down walls and build new ones. We erase boundaries and discover traps underneath. Change is hard enough, and so we make it fast. We accelerate. Go, go, go! Behind us, structures and visions and experiences so easily forgotten that they fail to lead us on. Do we dare forget? Would we be better served to honor what went before as we forge our way ahead? Remember, that the wisdom of the past may be filled with flaws, but there's also much relevant truth. Study what is true, because it matters to you. -- doug smith  

What if you declared yourself a leader but nobody followed you? It's not automatic. Even when it is your job title, in the end people decide whether or not they will follow you. I've done my best whenever I'm in a leadership position to create an environment of shared leadership. I'd rather facilitate success than drag everyone there. Still, not everyone responds the way you'd expect. Ever have someone resist following you? Ever have someone act in an insubordinate way publicly? Even escalating the energy might not work if they refuse to follow. It is a fair question to ask someone if they will follow you.  They could say "no" and if they do, maybe one of you is in the right place -- or maybe you've just got some more influencing and sharing to do. But, they can't say "no" forever, can they?  Check the rest of the team. Are you, as a team, moving forward the way you planned? Are you achieving your goals? Are you leading, in whatever your

Think about the best communicator you know. Not someone famous (unless you know them) but rather someone you interact with.  Have you noticed their communication skills get better over time? (If they didn't, you might have a different view on them...) No doubt they work on it and keep developing those communication skills. There's always something to learn. We are never finished developing our communication skills. I know I've got a lot of learning to do when it comes to communication. How about you?  Think again about that great communicator you know. Could it be the some of the times you felt they were the best at communicating that it had very little to do with what they said, but more with what they didn't say? Could it be that the way they listen says more than they could say any other way? Saying it best by listening is always welcome. I'm going to try to do that more often. How about you? -- doug smith

Is there something important that you need to say to someone you're not getting along with at the moment? Are you reporting a problem to people in your organization? Is that conversation difficult, controversial, or problematic? Say it with respect and kindness or keep it to yourself. -- doug smith 

"Questions are taken for granted rather than given a starring role in human drama. Yet all my teaching and consulting experience has taught me that what builds a relationship, what solves problems, what moves things forward is asking the right questions." -- Dr. Edgar H. Schein, Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling Retrieved 29 April 2023 from: https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/43958.Edgar_H_Schein