doug smith training

Is strength relative? The limits on strength are imposed by forces not sympathetic to your strength. You can do better. You can be stronger. I can be stronger. We all can develop our strength. No matter how strong you think you are, you are stronger than that. Just look at that muscle... -- doug smith  

How do you resolve a conflict? It's not a trick question. It is a tough question. And, in the end, some conflicts can only be managed until something gives -- we gain understanding, or our opponent gains understanding, or the cause of the conflict becomes irrelevant. Most conflict, though, seems to fall into the win/lose trap until we can skillfully pull it out into mutually shared understanding. Until we can find an outcome that is good for everyone -- what Fisher  & Urie call in "Getting to Yes" mutually beneficial outcomes.  Conflicts don't end without an agreement. As long as there is any shred of loss, the conflict continues. Even if what we imagine is the enemy is completely wiped from the face of the Earth, the source of that enemy remains and will re-appear somewhere down the road. Find the space for agreement. Find the mutually beneficial outcome. Work on what will matter most to everyone concerned: a truly fair resolution. -- doug smith  

Some people are strong all of the time, or appear to be. They built that strength over time, thru a series of challenges, difficulties, and misses. Tension and pressure produces strength, but the effort is so big that many of us miss developing our strength or increasing its capacity. It takes courage to take something on when you do not have the strength. You aren't fooling anyone, you can't really fake it until you make it, but you can increase the strength you already have. Every time you test your strength against that tension and pressure, you get stronger.  There's no getting that by ducking out. It comes from facing the problem with courage. Courage creates strength under pressure.  With that increased strength -- more becomes possible. Leaders need the courage it takes to build the muscle you do not have, until your strength matches your courage.  -- doug smith

I get a charge out of encouragement -- both when I encourage someone else and when someone else encourages me. It doesn't take much energy to provide encouragement, and the payoff is huge. A brighter day, a bigger smiler, a repeat of a task that was done correctly. Encouragement is free and the impact immense. However much you're encouraging others, what if you did it even more? -- doug smith  

Quick -- what can you do to immediately and dramatically increase your impact on your team? Encourage them. Provide as much positive feedback as you can. Listen to their ideas. Spend meaningful time with them and stay with them thru their mistakes and troubles. You didn't hire perfect people and they won't ever BE perfect -- when they are good and better than good, take notice. Share your enthusiasm, because they cannot read your mind. Encouragement is free and the impact immense. Maximize that impact. -- doug smith

"What's your goal?" is a good place to start. First figure out what you want, and then figure out how to get it. That's your goal. -- doug smith

Jazz it up! No, I don't mean add piano, saxophone, bass, and drums or whatever other instruments come to mind when you think of jazz -- I mean to spice it up, add some pizzazz, give it some drive. Give that goal the energy it needs by finding the real benefit to achieving the goal. What is it that you really want? What will this goal lead to? More influence? More power? More self-esteem? A better team, a better organization, a better world? Motivate that goal. A goal without motivation is a chore. A goal with motivation is...magic. -- doug smith

Do you take your goals too seriously? That may seem like an odd question for a coach to ask, yet if you are coaching someone -- or if you are reflecting on your own habits -- it is worth asking. Do you take your goals too seriously? Goals are important. They propel us forward. Goals keep us going when we might otherwise lose our way. Still, I do my best to remember that goals are created to help us, to serve us. While it does take a solid plan and relentless pursuit of that plan to achieve our goals, we should also consider: a) are those goals contributing to our purpose, and b) are those goals contributing to our happiness? Your goals are there to help you, not control you. Fair enough? -- doug smith

All the good we do is because of love. All the bad we do comes from missing love. When in doubt, love more. -- doug smith  

  We are so easily distracted. Quick to catch the latest gadget, widget, or shiny object, we divert our attention from the task at hand and follow bunny trails into the forrest.  A distraction could feel like a goal. We get pulled into those kind of little goals, little tasks, that hardly relate to our purpose at all. Maybe, not at all. We feel busy, but where is it leading? Time spent on the wrong goals takes time away from the right goals. That is obvious but hard to remember in the middle of distractions. -- doug smith

Sometimes the work is hard. Challenges force us to get creative, to muscle up and make a difference. Hard work feels harder when it's resisted. Instead of resisting, dig in, get deep, get done. -- doug smith  

Leaders have problems just like everybody else and they have an unfair ability to spread those problems. They can, with their power and influence, make things worse. But they don't have to. You don't have to. Leaders can also use their influence and power to make things better. Working well with others, leaders can solve those problems. Let's take the better choice. -- doug smith