Skip to main content

How to avoid the distraction of someone else's goals

Do people interrupt your work on your own goals because they want you to work on theirs?

How do you get back on track? How to you keep your focus on your own goals?

People mean well. It's a good thing that their goals are important to them. And, in many cases we find the time to help them with their goals and sometimes they reciprocate. That's healthy. What's a problem is getting so pulled into someone else's situation that your own goals go untended. That does not lead to success or happiness.

Here are some ways to keep your focus on your own goals:

1. Schedule time to work on them. Keep that time inviolate. When people interrupt, let them know when you will be available and not until then.

2. Post your goals so that others can see what you're working on. If you've written them skillfully enough, other people may interrupt so that they can work on YOUR goals.

3. Find an isolated placed to work on your goals (I'm doing that right now to avoid interruption!). Someone people like a busy place like a coffee shop -- others like a quiet room or nature spot. Find out what works best for you and choose it at least once this week.

4. When someone does interrupt, take the time to understand their reason. It may be valid. It may be worth your attention. In any case, they won't be ready to leave you alone until you've taken the time to understand them -- to validate either what they want or who they are. This can feel like it takes extra time, but in the long run will save you lots of time.

5. Align your goals with the goals of your organization. This keeps your focus on things that matter to the people who pay you. Why would anyone in your organization want to stop that from happening? The closer the alignment and more clear how your efforts advance the organization, the more freedom you will have to work on those goals.

What other ways have you discovered to avoid the distraction of someone else's goals? I'd love to know what also works for you...

--Douglas Brent Smith

Get the coaching you need to achieve your goals in our group coaching program:Achieving Your Goals.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Nobody's Perfect

If you've ever had a boss who treated you like you should be perfect, you know how uncomfortable and how unachievable that expectation is. As leaders, we need not ever expect perfection. What we are reasonable in expecting is constant improvement.  Even with constant improvement as an expectation, we should also realize that it is natural for people to plateau, for that level up to level off. It's like breathing. We can only inhale so much without exhaling. Expecting perfection guarantees disappointment. Expecting non-stop improvement invites burn-out. Let's be reasonably demanding leaders with the accent on reasonable. I'll try. How about you? -- doug smith  

Just Keep Learning

  How many times a day are you aware of forgetting something? Where you put your keys, where the phone is, what time that appointment is, why you walked into the room you just walked into...we forget things all the time.  While it does make sense to do what we can to develop and retain our memory, we just aren't ever going to remember everything. Plus, most of the stuff that we once tried so hard to remember just doesn't even matter anymore. That ninth grade algebra test? That phone number to an office that no longer exists? The mission of that business that would not hire you? Gone and gone and gone. We forget more than we'll ever remember so just keep learning.  Keep learning new material. Keep learning new skills. Keep learning new things about the people you love (and the people you don't yet love!) Keep learning! What have you learned today? -- doug smith

Make It Fun

When you need service, do you really want it to feel like a chore to the person providing that service? Do you flinch just a little after a "thank you" when the other person says "no problem"? I'm glad it wasn't a bother. I do wish it had a little heart in it. Maybe even a little fun. The best jobs at their peak appear to be fun for those observing. "How interesting!" "How magnificent!" "How effortless!" and yes, "How fun!." The best service feels more like play.  Instead of the all-too-common "no problem" what if we said a heart-filled, fun-boosted "my pleasure!" And, don't lie about it, make it fun. -- doug smith  

The Need to Act

Some of us like to analyze. Some of us like to act and let someone else analyze. Solving problems takes a balance. The most brilliant analysis producing the most wonderful ideas is all useless until someone acts. Some problems encourage eternal analysis, but that does not mean that eternal analysis is best. Some analysis is best accomplished with action. Think carefully, of course. Act boldly, also of course. -- doug smith 

Note to Self: Negotiate

Do you say "yes" too quickly or maybe "no" with no conviction? What if you could change the outcome of a request? What if you could more clearly decide how to get more of what is best and less of the rest? What if you negotiate situations more often? If you don't negotiate it you'll never know how good it could be.  -- doug smith Bonus Tip: The best book I've read on negotiating is "Never Split the Difference" by Chris Voss. 

Courage Against Corruption

Even when it looks like corruption is everywhere, we do not have to let it rule. Leaders need the courage to resist corruption -- no matter how small and no matter how large and no matter for how long.  When in doubt tell the truth, play fair, and act with integrity. Anything else will always catch up to you. -- doug smith  

A Better Future

It's too late to perfect the past but it's not too late to learn a better future. Where is your next lesson taking you? What future are you working to create? -- doug smith  

Find the Promise

  Every problem contains a promise.  That promise is a solution that leads to improvement, that leads to satisfaction, that leads to success. It's not guaranteed, of course, but the promise is there. Why hide from it? The promise of a problem sparks the seeds of success.  Find the promise, it will pull you toward the solution. -- doug smith

Blame Is Not Your Problem

'It's irksome to get blamed for a problem. That can raise emotions that make solving the problem even more difficult. If we can center ourselves first, breathe, and release the blame, maybe we can see what path to take. We can solve the problem. Getting blamed for a problem we didn't create doesn't prevent us from solving it. Let go of the blame, wherever it came from. -- doug smith   Action Step: The next time you catch yourself blaming anyone for anything, just let go of the blame. 

Keep Your "Yes" Ready

 When we are frustrated it is tempting to say "no." When customers are unreasonable it is oh so easy to say "no." As a high performance leader and as someone who learns to balance clarity, courage, creativity, and compassion, you'll hold off on that "no" long enough to consider a useful "yes." A yes that will please your customer and you as well. A yes that builds a relationship bridge instead of constructing a negative wall of "no". Sometimes, instead of saying "no" we need to say what it would take for us to say "yes". You can always say "no" later if you need to. Keep that "yes" ready, though, and it will likely work out for the best. -- doug smith