doug smith training

Have you ever been really interrogated? Have you ever been asked so many questions that it felt aggressive and intrusive, like an inquisition? There are times when it feels like we've had enough questioning. That could be a valid conclusion, or it could be a sign to open our minds and expand our perspective. Leaders must ask questions. We must ask open-ended, probing, curious questions. The truth could be in the fifteenth answer instead of the first. Keep asking. Respectfully ask, of course. And, then keep asking. Can I ask too many questions? What's your answer? -- doug smith

"The primary role of a leader is to ask relevant questions." -- Lester T. Shapiro It takes practice. It takes patience. It could even take persistence. Ask the questions. To help people think. To seek understanding. To empathize, emphasize, and connect. Every unasked question leaves room for assumptions. You know what they say about assumptions. Ask the questions. -- doug smith  

Centered leaders ask the questions that others are afraid to ask. Questions like: What's your vision of success? Is the organization doing all that it can to support your development? What part of serving our customers do you enjoy the most? Are given enough choices in how you do your work? Do you feel connected in meaningful ways to other people here? Questions like that. Deep, thinking, honest, open questions.  What would be a good question for you to ask today? -- doug smith  

  How flexible are your beliefs? Not so flexible that you consider switching to unethical or illegal choices, I hope. Flexible enough that you aren't codified in place. Flexible enough that you are willing to consider other people's ideas and, yes even beliefs. Your belief system is flexible so why not make it work for you? It's a simple way of expanding your possibilities. -- doug smith Notes: "Wait, is that a reference to the matrix?" "What do you think?" "I asked you first." "It depends on what you believe." "I believe that you meant it to refer to that movie..." "If it helps. But no, that's not what I meant. We aren't sleeping. We aren't living in a dream. We aren't extremely inefficient batteries keeping our robot lords alive. We're people who make choices every day and those choices are sometimes limited by what we believe." "How do you know what you believe is true?" "Exact...

"Questions are taken for granted rather than given a starring role in human drama. Yet all my teaching and consulting experience has taught me that what builds a relationship, what solves problems, what moves things forward is asking the right questions." -- Dr. Edgar H. Schein, Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling Retrieved 29 April 2023 from: https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/43958.Edgar_H_Schein  

As a recovering know-it-all I have stopped pretending that I know everything. No one does, so how could I know everything? But, there's still an endless thirst to learn everything, to gather as much knowledge as I can and put it to use and then share it.  That comes with lots of reading, tons of research, and constant education. And -- best of all -- with lots of questions. Every useful answer started as a brilliant question. Start with a question, and maybe the knowledge will flow. And if it doesn't --- ask a better question! -- doug smith Note: If you've been in any of my events you probably know that I learned to ask a better question from one of my mentors, Andrew Oxley. His exact quote is "if you don't like the answer to a question -- ask a better question." Thanks again, Andrew!

High performance leaders ask many questions before giving any answers. When in doubt, ask first. -- doug smith  

Do you like to argue? Whether or not YOU do, you probably can think of someone who seams to enjoy disagreeing. Arguments are contagious. I've gotten pulled into many arguments that eventually went nowhere and didn't contribute any progress to anything at all. So why argue? We argue to prove a point. We argue to convince. We argue to change behavior. But, how effective is that? Not very. Whenever I catch myself arguing now, I pause long enough to breathe deeply and think of a question. And then another question. And then another question.  It's harder to argue with a question. And with a question, we both might learn something. -- doug smith What have you learned today?

How do I know when I'm wrong? Have you ever thought about that? I know when I'm right -- don't you? But, there's my question. Don't I always feel like I'm right? Why else would I feel what I feel? Why else would I think what I think? There have been times -- well, OK, YEARS when I have clung to an idea that I thought was completely right only to discover later that it was not as clearly right as I thought. Things are usually more complicated than we give them credit for. What once made sense, over time, can take on new meaning or change completely. We're going thru a LOT of that now. Things are changing faster and faster. Ideas are morphing and transforming and fizzling and sizzling all over every day. What do we do with all that?  The more we cling to something that is wrong (inaccurate, unhelpful, disrespectful) the less good it does us or anyone else. Why do we do it? Sometimes, we don't know what we don't know.  It's like a moment in time, on...

Would you like another super power? There's a skill that, once you start using effectively, begins to feel like a superpower. You never have to settle for a poor answer again. I learned this from my mentor Andrew Oxley, who taught me "if you don't like the answer to a question, ask a better question." Try it. It takes practice. At first you might run out of questions. But, if you stick with it and work at it you can always, always, always come up with better questions. And if you get stuck, silence can even be your better question. Just don't give in. Just don't give up. Ask better questions. Remember what Andrew Oxley said: If you don't like the answer to a question, ask a better question.  -- doug smith

One of my mentors, Lester T. Shapiro, taught me that the primary role of a leader is to ask relevant questions. If we get that right, leadership becomes much more influence and much less pushing an agenda. Stay curious, keep learning, and keep asking questions. And when the questions lead you to a conclusion, maybe remember this: Every conclusion contains many more questions. Keep asking. -- doug smith

Is "why" the toughest question? It can sound accusatory. It can sound provocative. Used clumsily it can prevent information from being shared. It's a dangerous question. But it's useful. Sometimes as leaders we do need to know why. Stay curious. Not judgmental. When we need to know why, we need to know why. Part of communicating for results is getting the information that we need to make decisions. Hedging is for the stock market, not feedback conversations. It takes courage to ask why, and it takes courage to answer why. Ask it anyway. Ask it because. Why? -- Doug Smith