What Does A Promise Mean?

How do you feel about broken promises?

I hate them. They break my heart. They tear me up. And yet, I've broken lots of promises of my own.

It feels different when someone else breaks a promise. They've made a terrible mistake. And yet when it's me who has broken the promise I can easily find a rationalization or a reason or even put blinders on so that I don't see the broken promise.

Some days we all have blinders on. Some things we can't see because they're too close.

Then, what does a promise mean?

Is it really so transitory? Is it really just the hope of a promise and not really a promise? When we make a promise, how long are we obligated to keep it?

A promise is a promise. To break it requires a new agreement. If both people do not reach that new agreement, a broken promise is an infraction, a harm.

I'm learning oh so well to be very careful about promises. Careful about what I promise, and careful about what I accept from others as a promise. Maybe they mean it, and maybe they don't. From now on, I expect the truth about promises.

I'm not sure about your promise until I understand its premise.

What does it mean to you? When is it breakable? How enduring is it? Not from intentions, but from practice.

It will take practice - working to keep communication channels so clear that there is no doubt as to what we mean when we make a promise, but I am finding it absolutely necessary. I'm one broken promise away from believing there's no such thing as a promise.

And that would be a terrible belief to adapt.

Fortunately, there is something stronger than a promise - broken or otherwise. Luckily, there is something so strong that no one can ever take it away from you. Happily, we can navigate a landscape of shattered promises with that one stronger thing: forgiveness.

Letting go. Letting be. Forgiving.

Once the promise is gone, we can push ourselves down chasing its ghost, or we can forgive.

But that next promise...I'm going to make sure I know what it means.

How about you?

-- Doug Smith

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Bring the Light

High performance leaders spend much of their time coaching their people. We coach so that our team members can learn to generate the energy and effort they need to do their best work. We coach so that our team members will light up. But, sometimes, the light within our team members wanes. Sometimes, they need a boost. Sometimes they need us to light the way for them.

Bring the light. Light the way. Keep them on track. Then, watch them shine.

-- doug smith

The Royal Moves

Supervisors are asked to make more moves each day than a complicated game of chess. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes you end up in what feels like a stalemate. But you keep on pushing, you keep on growing, and you keep on growing.

Making the right moves, what I'd call the Royal Moves, requires training, experience, and an open mind. You need the open mind when the moves don't go exactly as you planned.

Are you making the royal moves?

Are your people growing, thriving, excelling, and delighting their customers?

Are you making the royal moves?

Is your own career developing in ways that challenge you and still bring a smile to your face? The royal moves keep you growing. It's deciding to plan more carefully so that the unexpected is not quite so unexpected. It's building the relationships that help you resolve inevitable disagreements. It's taking the time to coach your team members every day instead of letting administrative details pull you away. Th…

Goals Are Negotiable

Have you ever been stuck with goals that no longer work for you?

Did someone else stick you with those goals, or did you do it to yourself?

High performance leaders set lots of goals, but they don't get emotional about realizing that they can't possibly achieve all of them. Life brings complications, strategies change, better goals come along.

Working on a project, working for a boss, working on change -- if the goal is big enough there is likely to be disagreement. That's OK. Talk about it. Negotiate. Find a goal you can agree on instead of grudgingly plunging forward on a loser. And then, stay calm. There's no need to take a disagreement personally.

We can disagree on goals without becoming disagreeable.

-- doug smith

Work On Yourself

Work on yourself and then working on others gets much easier. They're more receptive, and you're more prepared.

-- doug smith

Choose Growth

Problems are aggravating, inconvenient, and frustrating. High performance leaders -- successful supervisors -- build muscle around solving problems that comes from practice, application, and outright solving. One problem after another, solutions come from facing the problems head-on.

A problem could lead to frustration, OR it could lead to learning and growth.

Go with learning and growth.

-- doug smith

It's You

Have you ever worked for a perfect leader? Me, either. And neither am I a perfect leader. We can't be perfect, yet we can work to be on the work toward perfection. It's a road we'll never finish.

I've been blessed to work with many great leaders, none of them perfect. But, some people have not been so lucky. Some people seem to have worked for a long streak of frustrating leaders or bullies. Maybe some of those people are headed for (or already on) your team. The news is good, though. You can greatly influence their future experience, even if you were previously less than what they needed in a boss.

It's a new day. It's a new time. You can be a new, improved, effective, attentive, high performance leader.

Start today.

Be the leader you always wished you had.
Someone else is wishing for that, too.

-- doug smith

Where Is Your Team Headed?

Have you ever seen steps to nowhere?

Since I travel a lot, I occasionally see a building with stairs that appear to lead nowhere, at least no where safe. Access is only semi-blocked, so the danger exists even if the destination is sketchy.

Does your team have a destination? Have you updated your team's mission this year? Things are changing so quickly that what may have seemed important as recently as a year ago could be out of date now (or soon.) Is your team up to date? Do you have a vision for a vital future?

Avoid those stairs to nowhere. Plan a vital, energized, noble future for your team. Get them involved. Show them how a high performance leader leads.

-- doug smith

Prioritize by Dropping those Dead Goals

Are you carrying any useless goals? Maybe they didn't start out useless, but still you carry them long after the energy has drained. If you've got goals that you no longer care about, that have no real customer, and don't align with your mission, you might want to let them go.

Focus on the right goals. The ones that make you both smile and sweat. The goals that once you have achieved them take you to a different place, put you in a better mood, or build something contributing to your success. Let go of the wrong goals to make room for the right ones.

The right goals help make the right decisions.

-- doug smith

Video: Marshall Goldsmith and Feed Forward

From Dr. Marshall Goldsmith, Executive Coach, comes this is a great way to share fast, low risk coaching with a number of people. The three steps are simple and easy:

Write down an area you'd like to improve that would have a big impact for youAsk for 2 positive suggestions for the future that would help with that areaRepeat getting positive suggestions from others in the group There are two simple roles for the process:

No talking about the pastNo judging or critiquing ideas
Here's Dr. Goldsmith describing the process in one of his highly useful videos:

I found this article and video from one of my favorite sources of leadership advice, GetLighthouse.com, here.

Share What Motivates You

If we don't share what motivates us we shall certainly share what de-motivates us.

Energize yourself to energize your team.

-- doug smith

doug smith training

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