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Relaxing My Temptation to Judge

How often do you judge people?

In my most judgmental of times I can judge everything about a person and find them constantly wanting. But what good does that do? How do I feel about being judged myself? Where does it all lead?

We are all deeply flawed humans. We make bad choices. We break things. We hurt people's feelings. That's all true (and more) about me and yet what makes me feel entitled to judge others?

It's another mistake.

The right balance, the right combination, the right focus, the centered degree of compassion, courage, clarity, and creativity makes much less room for judging others and much more room for working to understand.

I need to better understand other people, especially when they aren't sure that they understand themselves. I need help in being understood especially when I'm not operating with the best of clarity myself. It's a dance, but a dance of cooperation, not comparison. It doesn't matter if someone achieves more, gains more, builds more, or seems better than me. Comparing myself to them only makes me feel bad and does nothing to build any relationships.

Judging people will not make them more effective or better people.

Judging people just makes us sour.

That's not what I want. That's not what I strive for. So for today, I'm going to judge a little less. And maybe tomorrow, I can judge a lot less.

How about you?

-- Doug Smith

What have you learned today?


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