Open the Door

When was the last time you caught someone in a lie? How did you react?

It was probably not that long ago, maybe even today. People lie to each other everyday. Some of those lies we let pass, but some startle us so much in their boldness, in their malice, in their deviousness that we are emotionally moved to do something about it. What should we do?

We could react with anger. That is sure to stir up more anger.

We could react with sadness. Surely, we have every reason to be sad, but what will that accomplish?

A better reaction? Call to question the statement in question. Here are some things that work for me:

"I'm not sure that I understood what you just said, could you say it another way?" or
"I'm not sure I agree with that. Can you convince me?" or
"Wow." (the word I sometimes say when I can't think of what to say -- OR I'm thinking of a word that would not be socially acceptable or polite. And yes, even when you catch a lie in action you can still be polite. It might even be your best strategy.

Open up the lie. Examine it with curiosity. Clarify the intent behind the deception. What would cause someone to say such a thing? What is your role in the construction of that whole perception?
Open up the lie.

A lie opens up the door to tell the truth.

Tell the truth. Discover the truth. Uncover the truth.

-- doug smith

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Sing Your Song

The song of success contains many variations.

-- doug smith

I'm not the world's greatest singer but wow do I love to sing. And, sure enough, I cannot sing everything. Almost no one can, of course. We're all limited by our vocal range and even though we can expand that vocal range, almost no one can sing ALL THE NOTES.

And, we don't all like all the songs.

Success is like that. What one person calls success, another might think of as torture. I know some jobs that people absolutely love that would irritate me to try to do. My own definition of success has evolved over the years. As I have discovered my limitations in some areas of aspiration (oh no, I CAN"T hit that note, or OH NO I'm NOT going to be a professional athlete!) I have also discovered new horizons -- all very colorful, exciting, and new.

Success can be this simple: think of a goal, write it down, achieve it.

Of course it's work. Naturally, there's much more to it than that. And yet, the so…

Be Careful With Sarcasm

Are you gifted with sarcasm?

Many leaders take great joy in their sarcastic responses to questions and requests. It communicates a type of cynicism. Meant to be funny, but usually the only person who actually thinks that a sarcastic comment is funny is the person delivering it.

It's not that everyone is too sensitive. They just don't appreciate sarcasm.

As leaders, let's be careful to say what we mean, instead of verbally insulting someone else.

What do you think?

-- doug smith

Learn Constantly

What was the last lesson that you learned that you wish you didn't need to learn?

Learn isn't always fun. But, if we take the time to reflect on what we have learned, it CAN always be useful. Like that time as a child when I put my wrist on a hot stove. I had a scar for years, but I never did THAT again.

Or that time when I yelled at an employee in front of customers. It felt necessary at the time, but I soon realized that it was not productive and that it impacted the other team members and I've never done THAT again.

We need to learn. And the more we stretch ourselves, the more likely we are to learn things we hadn't planned on, some of them uncomfortable. Learn anyway. Grow.

Learn constantly, even when it hurts. Especially when it hurts.

-- doug smith

Challenge Your Assumption

If your assumption isn't helpful change your assumption.

-- doug smith

We all make assumptions, even when we know it doesn't help. Where do these assumptions come from? They come from old data, from old experiences, from filters so clogged we fail to see what is true. But the good news is that since assumptions originate from our own thinking, we can control that. We can change our thinking. We can change our assumptions.

Let's choose assumptions that lead to success. The people on our team WILL support us. Our leadership skills ARE growing. Our customers DO have reason to like our service.

If your assumption isn't working, if it just isn't helpful, change your assumption.

-- doug smith

Dignified Goal Achievement

How you achieve a goal is as important as achieving it.

-- doug smith

I don't believe in achieving a goal at any cost. While goals are important, our character matters more. How we treat people in the process of working on our goals matters. It's not a winner-take-all contest because when that IS the case there are eventually no winners. Instead, it is a win and share the winning choice that provides the most traction and the best results.

If you want positive results, use positive standards. People will eventually learn to treat you the way that you treat them -- noble or not. Stay noble. Stay ethical. Stay truthful.

Temptation has no place in achieving goals. Abuse, cheating, taking advantage of others -- no of this belongs in the portfolio of a high performance leader.

Lead effectively. Achieve your goals. And use processes that treat people with dignity and respect.

Think of it as dignified goal achievement. Your character remains strong and your reputation remains solid.…

Design Your Plan

The only unachievable goal is the one without a plan.

-- doug smith

Actions Matter

Be careful of letting good intentions create bad problems. Actions matter.

-- doug smith

You Can Do It

You can strengthen your self-esteem without anyone's help.

-- doug smith

Are you waiting for praise? Are you hoping for a great performance evaluation? Have you given any part of your control over your own self-esteem to anyone else?

I enjoy hearing good things. I like praise. Positive feedback is awesome. But do we need to wait for it? I don't think so. It's great when it comes, but the surest way to keep your self-esteem healthy is to know what you stand for and work toward that position. The best way to be happy about what you do is to do work that matters, to do work that makes things better for other people, to find joy in serving.

It's almost amazing, but what builds us up the most is taking care of other people.

Great leaders are in charge. Greater leaders are in charge and serving, at the same time. What a great way to build your own self esteem. You can do it. It's up to you.

-- doug smith

Ask Your Team

Energize your problem solving team today, tomorrow, and everyday.

Not sure how? Ask them how. They know.

-- doug smith

You've Changed

Do you ever get nostalgic? Do you ever wish that you could do something the way you once did, or be that person again?

Guess what? You can't. I can't. (and while I miss that 1966 Impala Supersport I once had, I don't think I miss the pants I was wearing back then...)

We can never be who we used to be. We have to keep growing. We have to keep learning. And, when we set new goals and head for new horizons, who we used to be matters a whole lot let than who we are becoming.

Who are you becoming?

-- doug smith

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