Could There Be More to the Truth?

My goal is to tell the truth. All of the time. That's more difficult than you might expect, given our daily temptations to tell little lies of convenience -- especially when we consider that NOT telling something a truth they are entitled to hear is a kind of lie of omission. No one is perfect, but with a little work and a clear intention, we certainly CAN tell the truth. It's a habit worth developing.

Once you get into that habit, of telling the truth all of the time, you may find yourself insisting on hearing only the truth from others. That's even more difficult. Some people lie so much that they don't even realize it. Some people lie so much that they come to believe their own lies. What do you do with that?

All we can do is to start by telling the truth. All the truth we know. We may later learn that we didn't even know all of the truth, or that someone else's view of a situation is different from ours (and just as true.) Still, let's start with telling the truth as we know it. Or, as don Miguel Ruiz says in "The Four Agreements," tell your truth.

Tell the truth. Tell me the truth. Just don't pretend you know all of it. There is still plenty of truth to discover, and what was once true might change.

How do you define truth?

-- doug smith

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The Best Goals

Goals are not created equally. Some we plow thru because they are necessary or even assigned. But some that we choose challenge us so strongly that we grow no matter what the outcome turns out to be. Some build new skills that we will use forever after. The best goals bring you growth and joy even when you don't achieve them. Select your goals carefully. Feel the joy. -- doug smith

Done

Trying to fix a problem from the past could cause a problem right now. When it's done, let it stay done. -- doug smith

With Love

Emotions can get in the way of solving problems. Stirring up anger, or fear is hardly ever helpful. But what if even in the toughest of situations we solved problems with love. There can't be too much love, can there? And the supply is always renewable and inexhaustible if we stay with it. Problems solved with love stay solved longer. We also feel much better about the whole thing. What do you think? -- doug smth

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Reason to Talk

That misunderstanding, that festering conflict, that difficult behavior...what are we to do? Talk it over. Bring it up. Conflict is reason to talk. Conversations cost less than making assumptions. Talk about it.

Easy on that Multitasking

It's tempting when there is so much to do to heap it up on your top performers. Give them that extra project. Delegate more. While delegation is a key part of high performance leadership, be careful about giving too many things to be done all at once. You know already that multitasking is risky. When you're driving a car you are multitasking -- your hands are doing one thing, your feet are doing another thing, and your eyes are busy on another thing, and it's all perfectly fine, until you add one thing too many. Looking at your phone or changing the controls on your audio, or glancing over your shoulder at the kids in the backseat -- all it takes is one thing too many to be much more than one thing too many. Disaster awaits. Most multitasking causes more problems than it solves. Single task when possible and simply find another way. It may take longer, but it probably won't in the long run. -- doug smith

Procrastination

Procrastination increases stress. Do the thing and be done with it. -- doug smith

The Real Secret

A few years ago there was a lot of attention on a personal development technique known as "the secret." I'm not here to debunk the secret or throw shade in its direction, because if you've heard about it you've probably already made up your mind. Like many of other methods, if it works for you, enjoy -- and if it doesn't, choose. This is not nearly so lofty a concept I'm about to share, and it's nothing that I've made up. It's been known forever. But just because it's known doesn't mean that it's easy. Just because it's simple doesn't guarantee success. Like anything worth working for, we've got to work for it. The magic ingredient to achieving your goals is discipline. That's it. Whatever your course of action, you've got to put in the work. Whatever great habits will propel you forward, you've got to sustain the discipline to keep doing them. Is that the real secret? You decide. -- doug smith

Optimism

Optimism isn't a guarantee but it is fuel for improvement. You have to think anyway, why not think positively. I've had to work on this. There were times when I was way too sensitive and way to perfectionistic which lead to being pessimistic. I learned that given a choice (and we always have a choice) it is far better to think optimistically. Not irrationally. You do still need to work. Just thinking positively is no lock no matter what anyone says. But it can pull you in a positive direction, and that's helpful. What do you think? -- doug smith

Seriously

Have you ever worked so hard on something that it made you miserable? Major goals do take hard work. When we set a goal if we're serious about it we must be ready to work hard to achieve it. But only if it matters. Only if we know that achieving that goal will make us better and happier or perhaps perform a noble good in the world. If a goal doesn't do that -- if a goal doesn't make you happy -- let it go. -- doug smith

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