What Would You Say?

If someone wanted to discuss a problem with you right now, what would you say?

Some days, I just don't have room for any more problems, how about you? Some days I just want to get thru and get some work done. How about you?

Some days, though, there is an opportunity to talk about what's going on and if that opportunity passes, it's gone forever. I remember a long car ride up the mountains to Breckinridge, Colorado one Valentine's Day when a problem (or hand-full of problems) unfolded a great opportunity to talk. For reasons still unknown to me, I could not talk. The words would not come. My body language didn't communicate what I was thinking and (perhaps) what I was thinking was too sad to say. I don't know. I wish that I did. What I didn't know at the time was that moment, during those steep climbs, there was an opportunity to resolve problems and that opportunity would never come again so freely, so safely, and so sincerely. It faded away.

It was still a good day, but the chance to tackle a problem was gone. The problem now had problems of its own.

One good problem could launch a thousand conversations. One good problem could raise a thousand brilliant powerful questions. But you've got to have the courage to talk about it.

Look for that next opportunity. Embrace it. Savor it. Refresh in it. Talk about it.

-- doug smith

Comments

Fix The Problem

Fighting a problem does not require us to fight other people. We don't need to agitate when we can collaborate. Fix the problem (which is likely caused by flaws in the process, design, or environment) and the people will be fine. -- doug smith

To Be The Best

You could rely on luck. You could depend on inheritance. Maybe you could fake it until you make it. All of those courses of action are unreliable. As an old friend used to say about buying lottery tickets: "It's for people who think that the answer is outside of themselves." To be the best work harder than the rest. That's the only secret formula you need. -- doug smith

Gain That Personal Input

Do you like it when other people make decisions for you? Me, either -- and neither do the people on your team. That's all the more true about decisions that become, or feel like, rules. Our inner rebel will rise. A rule we didn't make seems much easier to break. If you want your team to keep certain rules, first find out how they feel about those rules. -- doug smith

Leveraging Shared Problems

As frustrating as it is, some people don't care about your problem until you make it their problem, too. But you don't have to manipulate them into it. Talk about it. Share your concerns. Find the connections and you'll also find their investment. Once they are in, collaboration is far more likely. -- doug smith

Build The Right Connections

Build the connections that strengthen your team and release the ones that tether your team to trouble. What we hold tight might not be what we need now. Deliberate connection just might take your full attention. -- doug smith

No Hiding

We can't hide from a problem. It will find us. Every single time. -- doug smith

Broken Trust?

It hurts when a trust has been broken. It might even feel unforgivable. It should be possible for someone who has broken trust to rebuild it -- but it won't be fast, and it won't be easy. When in doubt, for all you are worth, maintain that trust. -- doug smith

Good Advice Gone Bad

How are you at taking advice? Do you respond quickly and decisively when someone offers you sound and well considered advice? Do you respond favorably to consultations? To tell the truth, I'm not so good at it. As a recovering know-it-all I struggle to consider an idea that wasn't my own. I'm better at it than before (that's the recovering part) and yet sometimes I just resist. It's good to take good advice. Sometimes, though that good advice has an expiration date. What makes sense today may not make sense a year from now, or two years from now. Once we move toward taking good advice we still have the duty of due diligence to watch out for change, to stay alert for expiration. Because once we have bought in, it feels like a mistake to let go. But, sometimes we do need to let go. What advice are your holding onto that does not make sense today? -- doug smith

No Crystal Ball

"My crystal ball is broken and all the snow has dried up..." says my friend Linda whenever someone expects her to read their mind or tell the future. The information is not available. We can spend a lot of time looking for shortcuts. What passes for an insight could be instead a slight. With all the tools and software we have available we still do not have workable crystal balls. My job might be easier if I had a crystal ball, but if I did have a crystal ball then I wouldn't be needed. Worth considering? Let's not fear the future. Let's do the work that's right in front of us while keeping sight of our mission. -- doug smith

Continue The Search

What happens when you've found what you've been looking for? If it was difficult, if you worked hard, if there were some challenges along the way you will likely be grateful and satisfied. How long will that satisfaction last? We are meant to be happy. We are meant to be fulfilled. But, we're not meant to stand still. Find what you're looking for and then keep looking. Growth is always ahead of you. -- doug smith

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