Truth or Tales?

True story: when I was much younger I was known to tell a tale or two. They were usually rooted in reality, but I'd embellish the truth to make it more interesting. Like that story I'd tell about my trip to McSorley's in New York when I ran into John Lennon. We had a nice conversation. Except, he wasn't there. I thought of him, and he lived in New York at the time, but seriously was much more likely to be on the other side of town. Go figure.

How many times did I tell that tale? Maybe once or twice. Once to my best friend at the time. Did she believe me? Not if she knew me well enough...

How about you? Do your fish stories end up with bigger fish than you actually caught? Do you augment reality with some great tales?

I got a great gift last December from one of my good friends and fraternity brother, David Spiegel. It's a coffee mug with the saying "Keep telling the stories" written on it. I love it. I don't think that he meant "tell tales." I think he's encouraging us to remember the stories that brought us to life and keep bringing life to us years after they've past. And (more importantly) to keep telling NEW stories of the new adventures we are creating.

Because who knows how long any of us has?

When it comes to leadership, tell your team the truth. Stories are inspiring, and most useful when they are based on truth. I suspect that none of us knows the complete, unfiltered truth. The best we can do is stop adding our own filters. Tell your truth.

The best story is no match for the truth.

So do tell the stories. And, if you want to, make the fish as big as you want. Just give me a wink so that I'll know...

-- Doug Smith

Comments

Sizing Our Influence

Our influence is usually smaller than we want it to be but greater than we realize. That's a good thing because humility helps our influence grow. -- doug smith

Acceptance vs. Endorsement

Accepting a truth does not mean endorsing it. Sometimes it really is what it is. Until you change it. -- doug smith

Connections

It's in our differences that connections are made. -- doug smith

Some of What It Takes

Leadership is hard. Challenges peck away at us, demanding response. I don't have all of the answers (who does?) but this might help a little. A little advice to myself that I am happy to share. It takes clarity to know where you are going, creativity to inspire new ways to get there, compassion to help those who are in you way, and courage to stay the course even in the face of opposition. Which of those strengths do you excel in the most? What's your secret to leadership success? -- doug smith

Portable

Leadership, no matter how much it is intended to be permanent, is temporary. A day comes when the direction changes, the dance shifts, and the once stable boss is lost. Lost in direction, lost in relevance, lost in the times. What if we kept our leadership portable? Leadership could be fluid, flexible, and responsive as it remains centered. As circumstances change, our leadership must flow with it while finding the strength of a foundation without the chains of stagnation. That's not easy but it's part of the art of leadership. Partly science, partly art, leadership requires us to know when it's time to stand and know when it's time to flow, and yes even know when it's time to go. Portable is more powerful than authority if authority is not portable. We don't need to ask for change in order for change to change us. -- doug smith

Shake It Up

Inspiration has its own time table, but sometimes we have to shake up the clock. Maybe instead of waiting for inspiration we should meet it halfway. How else will it ever find you? -- doug smith

Disappointment

How do you handle disappointment? Things don't always go the way we want them to. Maybe that date didn't turn out like you planned. Maybe the team missed a deadline on that important project. Or, maybe you said something you later regretted. There was a time when I would get stuck in my disappointment. It would turn into a binding, cringing loop of doom, waiting to repeat again and again. Not fun. Perspective helps. In the big scheme of things, how important will this be a year from now? Five years from now? Some disappointments could last that long, but seriously, most do not. Feel it, let it go, get over it. Disappointment simply proves that we can always make things better. And to make things better, let's move forward. -- doug smith

On Sarcasm

Many people sense a natural gift for sarcasm. A funny remark at someone else's expense might make you laugh, but what about the person the humors is directed toward. To say afterwards "it's just a joke" misses the obvious -- there is an element of truth inside that joke or at least an element of intention. I know that I am overly sensitive about sarcasm and I know that many people find it funny. If it bothers me, though, I expect that it bothers other people, too. Even when we get the joke, we do not think it funny. It's worth asking yourself before that joke emerges floating on mean spirits with the wit whether or not sarcasm is your best choice. And when someone uses sarcasm on you, it's worth being bold enough to ask them. "Is sarcasm your best choice right now?" Because they can do better. We can all do better. But, sarcasm does not help. -- doug smith

Instincts?

Many leaders like to rely on their instincts. It's easy. It feels right. With enough experience, sometimes those instincts are spot on. But not always. If you want to trust an instinct make sure that you now and can trust the source of that instinct. Is it real? Is it relevant? Is it recent? Feelings are great, but show me the data every time. -- doug smith

Right Now

Here we are. Whatever is in front of us. Whatever challenge we ponder. Now is the time. Every moment makes a difference, especially this one. -- doug smith

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