Why do people pursue goals that cause pain? When one person's ambition causes another person's anguish that is not a noble goal. It is not sheepishness or lack of courage that cautions us to take care of other people and their needs -- it is basic human decency.
High performance leaders do not need to create harm. We make important decisions. We can balance our goals with the consequences and chose those that create only value.
That does not rule out competition. Sometimes we DO need to compete. When we need to compete (hey, I like a good contest as much as anyone) we do it fairly, within the rules, with no intention of harming anyone. I can block your shot without breaking your arm. You can tackle me without causing a concussion. It is possible to assertively work for a win without creates debilitating loss.
Seek good goals. Work on noble goals.
A goal is no good if it results in harm.
-- doug smith